Loss in control.

For no discernable reason today, I cut. Deeply. It had been so long. I tried to stay clean, as it were, it was keeping me on-edge. I have been a veritable asshole for far too long.

And so, I wound up cutting the fingers and forearm with twine. It can cut through conduit, and yes, apparently flesh, as well. I despair for the fact that I felt so out-of-control that I resorted to something like that, but I feel I had little choice. At first I was certain it would not work...there is definitely a process and technique involved. Conditions are poor at the moment, and Friday will prove to be unbearable, I am certain. It is best to let my wrath go in portions now, so there is less damage to deal with later.