Fuck it.

No more charades. I have seemingly lost control. This is not something I wish to delve into, and so I shall leave it at that. I need help. I am not certain I care at the moment. Lost, I still feel lost. Hopelessly lost. I need ideas. I feel unsafe at the moment, and I have tried several things that have backfired violently. Nothing seems to help; I lash out at friends, I bury myself in self-destructive behaviors. Something is amiss.