Many things.

A very busy week, this. The one year anniversary of having not self-injured was the eighteenth, and 21 August was the Host’s birthday. There was the usual chaotic social visits to various homes for gifts, cake and whatnot. The Host is happy, as the boyfriend’s parents no longer despise her. They see we are moving on, and not so "crazy" anymore.

We went to the Paris for the birthday meal with the boyfriend. The buffet there is excellent. French food is exceedingly rich but perhaps the most lovely to touch the palette. Outside the seating area, a man on a three-wheeled bike was selling baguettes, and another playing the accordion was serenading the audience. The Paris’ main attraction is that is is not so much a casino, as it is a slice of a village. Even the employees are called "citoyens". (I am certain I butchered the spelling on that.)

On a slightly different note, the French flags have since been replaced, and it is more realistic now. It looked silly for so many American flags flying over the Arc de Triomphe.

Also, one of the Host’s favorite bands, Maná, is coming to the Mandalay Bay. She spent $154 on two tickets. Granted, the seats are spectacular, but I am certain the money could have been spent in a more productive manner. The boyfriend is accompanying her, even though he speaks not a word of Spanish. Despite how he treats us Inside, at times, he is a good man.

On 26 August, the Host will have been Christian for two years. I am wondering: why is it I still feel shunned by God? I know I must trust Jesus, and yet I still wonder if His words apply to me. Trust is still a very difficult concept for me—for us, really. I wish I had stronger faith..